Another clueless, airhead model

Friday, September 11, 2009

You can take the man out of the transient but you can’t take the transient out of the man.

So this is what life in the FWS region 2 HQ is like - sitting at a desk by a window where the view is dominated by an eight story abandoned building. For the first time in years I had to make a major purchase of casual office clothes because no one here wears the FWS uniform. I say this with trepidation because Chelsea may take umbrage that I haven’t bothered to purchase nice clothes in the four years she’s known me.
I’ll dispense with the names to protect the innocent but a number of employees felt I was important enough to want to come by sometime to discuss business relating to my refuge complex. Although I’m the acting regional biologist for TX,OK, NM and AZ I was given an initial assignment to write a white paper on the habitat requirements for mottle ducks on the Gulf Coast. Actually I’m regurgitating what information was sent my way from the coastal biologists. My colleague, Dr. Jennifer Wilson (the Bird Lady of Brazoria), submitted ample information which I thought was sufficient but will have to wait for more from the other biologist if/when they choose to send it. I say initial assignment because now they also want me to look into alternatives to genetically modified crops that were grown on an Oklahoma refuge. Growing these “Franken Foods” brought on a lawsuit.  I've yet to meet the Director of the FWS region 2, Dr. Tuggle, nor am I in a hurry to do so.  Jennifer suggested I pee on his chair to establish myself as the Alpha. 
Something about going back to New Mexico made me think about the old transient days. I know there’s free money here at the plasma center and Ramen noodles still must cost a few for a buck. I can always revert back to the old ways when society breaks down. I have use of an old bike to travel the 3.5 mile route to work. Downhill in the morning and uphill after work. No Tour de France but steep enough that if I stop peddling I’ll fall down within 10 feet. Doing this for 5 day/week allows me to forgo running for the month; something I hate but will never give up. They gave me a hotel room and food money for the duration but why spend the dough at the Fudruckers when when fruit, chips, boiled eggs and peanut butter sandwiches are just as filling day in and day out? Just like the old transient days. Tomorrow the mountains.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Ahhh yes! Welcome to life in a Regional Office Tommy. Sitting inside while everyone else gets the real work done outside and gets pissed that the Regional Office folks are only getting in the way of real work. It's lots of fun over here in Region 8. At least you're in Refuges and not Ecological Services. Anyway, I highly suggest shaking Ben's hand and not peeing on his chair. He's really a nice guy and cares about his employees alot. There are other Regional Directors who are not as nice. Hope all is well...